HER EYES

With Women's Month upon us, I gotta say something. If I ever find myself on a plane travelling through dark, stormy skies, I'd want a woman to be my pilot. Why? Because women's eyes are so much better than men's. I'm talking super-advanced exceptional vision.

Think about it...

A man looks for something three times, but he still can't find it. It could be a missing sock or a TV remote or one of his very own children. His wife looks and finds it first time around. In fact, she told him where to find it before she even started looking. And of course she was right (which he hates to admit).

A woman's eyes can find a parking space from at least one hundred metres away. No matter how crowded the parking lot is, her laser eyes would put Superman to shame in their ability to seek out the free space. Her man would rather park in the first space he sees, which is exactly... you guessed it... one hundred metres from the mall entrance. And then he has to pretend he doesn't see the parking space right next to the entrance. You know, after he's just made his wife walk a distance of one hundred metres.

A woman and a man have the same number of eyes. But a woman can use those eyes to watch three kids, a boiling pot on the stove and a TV show... all at the same time. For generations, moms have warned kids they have eyes at the back of their heads. And you know what? I believe it. I mean... just look at the proof.

A woman knows how to read the fine print, and not just when it comes to paperwork. She can read the words between the words, and find out what people are actually saying. A man will listen to a friend talk about a first date, and all he'll find out is the quality of the steak. A woman listens to the same story and builds an entire case file about both parties – full relationship history included.

A woman can see potential. She can look at a rundown old house and already see the colour of the paint on the newly-renovated walls. A woman can see when her kids are hungry just by looking at them. She can also see when someone really needs to have a good chat.

Okay, I'm getting soppy now and it's not really in my nature. Point is a woman's eyes are unlike anything else in the world. A man's hearing is pretty amazing too. He can hear a rugby match all the way down the street. Then again, he can't hear a woman calling from the room next door. But that's another story for another time.

NOT QUITE "IN THE PINK"!
WOMEN IN EYECARE