The sun starts shining and the flowers come out. You can't wait to drive into the countryside and frolic in a field of yellow. (Okay, I've never frolicked in my life but you know what I mean...) So you park your car on a green, green hillside and throw open the door. You take a deep breath, step onto the grass… and step right back into your car. Because your eyes are itching so bad it feels like there are baby ants dancing on your eyeballs.

As if the season of blooming flowers isn't enough, spring also happens to be the season of love. So instead of leaving those blossomy irritants in the countryside where they belong, people pick them and sell them at a massive profit to lovers everywhere. You know how it works – supply and demand. The demand for romance is so high that suddenly the cities are full of flowers too. And no matter where you try to hide, that pollen will find you and work its special magic on your eyes.

Then there's the all-too-famous red eye. Like I said, spring is the time for romance, which also means it's the time for romantic movies. So maybe your eyes are red because you've cried your way through a tearjerker starring Sandra Bullock. Not that you'd tell anyone that. The whole reason why cinemas are dark inside is so people can cry to their heart's content.

So maybe the red-eye is from crying through a love story. Or maybe it's the pollen plus the change of seasons plus everything else that's hanging in the air.

Yup, we all know how heartwarming it is to see animals giving birth to their babies in the springtime. But for anyone prone to allergies, it just means more things to irritate your eyes. More cat hair, dog fur, chicken feathers, hamster whatevers… and the list goes on. Mathematically speaking, the birth of new animals exponentially increases the potential for red, itchy, swollen eyes.

I know what you're thinking. I'm ruining spring. If there was a Scrooge or a Grinch for spring, I would be it. But I'm not trying to be negative. I'm not trying to ruin the happiest time of the year. All I'm saying is this magical time can be absolute torture on the eyes.

So take care out there. Don't rub your eyes (which you should never do anyway). Wear sunglasses that protect your eyes against little bits of pollen and weird stuff in the air. And of course, talk to your eye care professional if you need any help getting the problem under control.

And if you're super-sensitive, don't go outside on windy days. Lock your doors, close your windows, and frolic through your living room until you can frolic no more.